American Idol producers are on the prowl for a judge to take the place of departing Paula Abdul, and turning the spot into a freak show while they are at it. Shock-pop star Katy Perry and manufactured pop diva Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham are amongst the temps that will be filling in for Abdul when American Idol returns in 2010, proving that Idol producers haven't a clue of how to replace Paula. Granted either one of them would be a hoot sitting next to Paula, as replacements these picks are pure sensationalism and don't present much sensitivity towards the American Idol fans. Congratulations Idol devotees, you've been reduced to the status of a flock of crows, easily distracted by shiny objects – or so the gods of American Idol seem to think.
Publicity stunt? I think we are well beyond that now. The first cries that Paula was in on some marketing effort meant to renew interest in American Idol and rebuild the deteriorating – but still formidable – audience were cute, but now it's just plain deluded. Although I have to admit, bringing in Perry, whose quaint cries for attention include "I kissed a girl" and "ur so gay," and Posh, who famously admitted she never really did anything other than pout (and get breast implants), does seem like a demonstration of how low the show can sink. At least they didn't bring in Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian.
The bottom line is, to truly 'replace' Paula you have to have someone who approximates her naivete while packing the cahoonies necessary to wrangle with Simon, and occasionally Randy, while still being able to project that 'little sister' vibe. In other words they need Paula, but that's not happening. According to FOX, all negotiations are off. A pity.
