Sal, Smitty, Paul, Peggy and Harry are auditioning an Ann Margaret lookalike. After Harry leeringly asks her to do the twist again and she complies, then leaves, Peggy reminds him he’s not a part of the decision making process. Pete and Ken come in and break the bad news they’ll be working all weekend because Bacardi needs ideas on Monday. Except Pete, Ken and Harry won’t be there, since they’ll be at Jane and Roger’s Derby Day Party.
Joan and some girls are heading out to lunch when she runs into the new Mrs. Sterling. She and Joan make veiled snipes at each other while Jane wears what looks like a marshmallow on her head. Since I hate Jane, I will temporarily approve of Joan’s smoking since she gets to blow smoke in her face.
Peggy tells her new secretary Olive not to include Harry in anymore casting calls. Olive seems more competent than the recently demoted Lola.
Betty’s excited about Roger and Jane’s party. She bought a dress! She also likes her booze, which she swipes from Don, even though she’s preggers.
Sally reads The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire to Grandpa Gene. She’s quite the little reader, and only gets tripped up on the word “licentiousness”. Don pops in to send Sally off to bed. Grandpa Gene says they’ll continue their reading tomorrow, adding, “All hell’s gonna break loose.”
Paul, Smitty, and Peggy are “working”. Working means drinking rum and Cokes, and playing golf with a fraternity paddle and an orange. After Smitty confesses drinking makes him sleepy and he prefers weed, Smitty and Paul start to wax poetic on the joys of Mary Jane, with Paul claiming pot saw him through his senior thesis at Princeton. Peggy gets the first of her many great lines of the episode, saying, “Paul helps me sleep.” Paul sends her off to get a blender, since he’s not able to since he’s eating an orange. Apparently Princeton didn’t teach him to multitask.
Peggy runs into secretary Olive in the kitchen. Olive’s working because Peggy’s working! Peggy says she can go home, but Olive is Johnny on the Spot and won’t hear of it.
Smitty gets Paul to call his friend, aka dealer, and score some weed.
Betty orders Sally to zip her in her beautiful white lace dress. Seriously, 90% of people don’t look this good ever, and she does when she’s 8 months pregnant. If I didn’t love her, I’d be pissed. Betty tells Sally not to bother Grandpa Gene, so of course Sally runs off to find Grandpa Gene. He’s in the loo, but she notices his money clip and steals a fiver.
Joan and her rapist husband are getting ready for a dinner party at their apartment. She comes up with an excellent compromise on the seating arrangements, which he is too much of a rapist idiot to appreciate, but she demands a kiss for her smarts. She deserves a lot more.
Don appreciates Betty’s new party dress, but she complains about being in her “condition.” Gene rushes in, followed by Carla, shouting how he’s been robbed. Betty tells Don to give him $5, and Gene spits he doesn’t want his money, saying, “You people think money is the answer to every problem.” “No, just this particular problem,” Don retorts. Point to Don! Don takes that as his cue to exit with Betty, and Carla herds the kids to the yard.