The Top 10 Quotes from the Movie “Better off Dead”

Better Off Dead was originally supposed to be a very dark movie since Lane was feeling suicidal after his girlfriend dumped him. Throughout the first part of the movie he’s trying to find ways to kill himself, but the problem is that he’s either too inept or he’s being beaten to the punch by those around him that tend to do things that foil his best efforts. After a while of moping however he finally discovers a reason to live, well, a couple of reasons really. First is the chance to win back his girlfriend by skiing against the guy she dumped him for. The second is an attractive and knowledgeable young French exchange student that helps him to fix his broken down automobile.

Motivation is a great thing to battle depression.

10. Two dollars!

The paperboy is nothing less than absolutely demanding as he tries to collect his money for delivering the paper. He goes so far as hounding Lane every chance he gets and becomes one of the most iconic parts of the movie.

9. Go that way, really fast. If something gets in your way, turn.

Great advice if you’re playing a skiing game, less than great if you’re on the mountain and heading down at an accelerated pace.

8. Now that’s a real shame when folks be throwin’ away a perfectly good white boy like that.

Keith David would make a similar remark in Men at Work with Emilio Estevez and Charlie Sheen.

7. Two brothers… One speaks no English, the other learned English from watching “The Wide World of Sports.” So you tell me… Which is better, speaking no English at all, or speaking Howard Cosell?

Anyone recognize the guy that was in Karate Kid II? At least here he’s not getting out of the car to challenge Lane to a death match.

6. This is pure snow! It’s everywhere! Do you have any idea what the street value of this mountain is?

Leave it to the guy that played Booger to deliver a line about doing drugs in a movie.

5. I figured if we had nothing to say to each other he would get bored; go away. But instead he uses it as an excuse to put his testicles all over me.

She did mean to say tentacles but it came out a little funky. Trying to speak with an accent can do that after all.

4. Look Charles, I gotta do this. If I don’t, I’ll be nothing. I’ll end up like my neighbor Ricky Smith. He just sits around crocheting all day and snorting nasal spray.

The sad thing about Ricky is that all you’d have to do is look at his mother to see why he was so messed up.

3. I think all you need is a small taste of success, and you will find it suits you.

Did you notice how Lane’s success tended to make him a lot more confident in himself?

2.  I have great fear of tools. I once made a birdhouse in woodshop and the fair housing committee condemned it. I can’t.

Some guys are just not mechanically inclined.

1. Gee I’m real sorry your mom blew up Ricky.

Yeah, a mouthful of lighter fluid will tend to do that when it’s sucked down like alcohol.

One of the classics, hands down.


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