This week starts with Jack and Dan (wearing shirts that might blind me in their brightness) investigating a vandalized electronics store mascot. Exactly the kind of thing drunk college students might do.At the same time, a drugstore — which may be the same one from ‘Broken Door Theory’— is being robbed by a pair of yokels who really don’t know what they just stole. Which of these is more interesting? Yep, but Jack and Dan don’t have that kind of cred. Our boys go out on a stakeout to protect the mascot, by which I mean they get drunk together. Six beers, a bucket of wings and four shots later, Dan is impersonating a mobster. Only on this show could these three things come together at all.
We find out seven years earlier, Dan was undercover as a mobster named Silvio — and slept through his own sting operation, thus losing a ton of department money and tanking his career. Of course, this means the lightbulb goes off over Dan’s head and he decides to go bust the mobsters and make up for it. Cover intact, he goes to meet the dim-witted mobsters to see what they’re up to. Ruiz is not impressed, too worried with the pharmacy robberies, but one can see she agrees to let them go if only to get him away from her. The cops set up to bust the mobsters…only to find out that there’s nothing but seafood to be had. Dan, however, is insistent and clearly way too deep into his cover.
Unfortunately for him, the mobsters spot Jack and find out that Dan is a cop. Jack gets taped to a chair, and Dan gets made. He pretends he doesn’t know Jack is a cop. Jack is horrified by having to see Dan mostly naked when the mobsters strip-search him. They don’t find the wire, though, because we find out he took it off fifteen minutes earlier. Dan is so in-character he smacks Jack around a bit. I’m more horrified by Bradley Whitford having to act for a good quarter of the episode in a Speedo. Dan takes Jack into the freezer under the pretense of killing him but leaves him there to escape later, only to come out and find the mobsters have actually moved on and have careers. There’s no score at all.
That’s when the yokels turn up with guns thinking they can drop in on the heist that doesn’t exist. Dan gets dragged off and Jack manages to open the freezer door with his tongue, but can’t get out of the chair he’s tied to. He struggles to call Liz, but she hangs up on him. Falling off the chair, however, liberates him and he goes to rescue Dan…who is at the electronics store with the mobsters and yokels, who have moved from pharmacies to smart phones. But they don’t know the boxes are empty.
Jack blows Dan’s cover again and exposes the lack of heist to the yokels. However, this is all interrupted by the pair of disgruntled electronics store employees who are using the mascot for vandalism (again). All hell breaks loose, before the cops arrest the yokels and let the now-innocent former mobsters walk free. Ruiz concedes the all-too-convenient point, while Liz and Jack try to make up without making reference to the fact that they kissed last week. Everything gets wrapped up nicely. Until next week when Jack gets tasered by Dan. Yep, you heard me. For that alone, next week will be one heck of a summer finale.