Turns out Robert Pattinson Just Wants a Hot Dog Like the Rest of Us

Celebrities must have it rough. The rest of us can walk around like it’s no big deal because really, it’s not. If we want a hot dog we either go the store and pick up a pack or we go to the nearest place we know sells hot dogs and voila, we’ve got ourselves a dog on a bun with whatever we want to put on it. But celebrities? They seem to believe they can’t walk down the street without getting mobbed every step of the way. Some people might be right, some of them might be so ungodly famous that people will ask for pictures or autographs everywhere they go. But Robert Pattinson, despite being quite famous and well-known, doesn’t seem to operate on the level when he’s hungry.

Yes, people will recognize him, that’s obvious. But will they really mob him? Are there enough people in the “labyrinth” that is New York to really care enough that a celebrity is walking among them? Honestly it seems that in certain parts of the city you might be able to run into any number of celebrities. If people do stop and stare it’s not exactly the end of the world. If they exclaim over who you are it’s still considered polite to keep walking as long as you acknowledge them. This is the mind of a celebrity that’s extremely hungry and as a result entirely paranoid. Maybe that’s why it’s so comical.

What this goes to show is that Robert Pattinson is actually a humorous kind of guy.

His inner monologue sounds absolutely crazy.

He wants to, he doesn’t want to. He feels trapped, he feels cloistered, and then he sees a hot dog. Where did it come from? Where did the guy get it? Why can’t he get a hot dog? Where is the hot dog stand? As he works himself into a tizzy you can almost hear the wires sparking and the gears grinding in his head as he tries to figure out whether his hunger is going to be strong enough to override his lack of desire to be seen on the street. You might be frowning at this point or at least shaking your head, but his inner struggle finally gives way to the growling of his stomach as he makes his way to the street.

People might be staring at him because he’s acting weird, not because of who he is.

It’s said that New Yorker’s have seen it all, done it all, blah, blah, blah. But really if a guy is acting that kooky and he’s that close to you the natural reaction is usually to be on guard. That tends to mean you watch them closely, even if they’re a recognized movie star. Be honest, he acts like a crazy man as he tries to escape notice everywhere he goes. It’s almost as if he believes he’s being followed at some points and then short circuits at others. I mean really, at one point he has his phone in his mouth for a reason that a lot of people couldn’t fathom. But then, wonder of wonders, he finds Papaya King, and all it is well. As he snarfs down his relish-coated dogs he smiles and with open arms thinks, “You can call me Rob, I eat hot dogs!”

And all was right with the world.

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